I have this image of a kitchen floor with a broken milk jug on it, and spilled milk in a big puddle. The story that goes along with it is:
There once was a young boy who opened his fridge, and when he did, he somehow knocked the milk jug onto the floor. His father came home and discovered it. The little boy was feeling really bad. His father wasn't angry, though; he knew that these things happen and that it's O.K. He didn't want his son to beat himself up over it, or even to feel too badly. He wanted his son to feel sorry and apologize out of love, because he cares about his father and his things and realized that he did cause some small loss, but he didn't want his son to feel sad or afraid of his fathers' response, or angry with himself or anything like that. He wanted to let his son know that he understands that we make mistakes and that it's allright, and that he still loves him the same as before, and forgives him for his mistakes. Still, all love and joy intact, he wants his son to know that we are responsible for our actions and that he needs to set things aright, so he asks his son to clean up the mess (he even helps him clean it up some) and to buy a new milk jug and milk with the money that he must earn through working for his father, maybe raking lawns or something like that. And, last but not least, he asks his son to do his best not to repeat these mistakes, if he can.
I think this is one of the lessons we can learn from the story of the chet haegel (sin of the golden calf). The little boy would be Yisrael, and the father or mother would be Hashem. Although, there, in building the golden calf, we made a very big mistake, arguably the biggest mistake ever, and still, even though there were some painful repercussions (which, if we can see deeply enough, were also from the most dear love), soon Hashem did forgive us, and helped us to make repair, and declared how much He loves us and will always continue to -- the Thirteen Atttributes.
There's always so much room for all of us to grow. Endless, maybe -- hopefully. Which means that from a certain perspective, we will always lack very much and have new mistakes to make, and we will be loved through it all, and life will continue to be a reason to rejoice, even though we are responsible and held accountable for our actions.
There's a funny thing with mistakes. As Rav Alon Silberg told us last year in teaching us about Pesach: why do we have to annul the chametz (leavening) after we already searched every nook and cranny of our house? To let us know that there's always more chametz to find; that we've never gotten it all. What yesterday looked perfect may tomorrow look like a mistake. It's not for us to complete the task; it's just not for us to desist from it. As we grow, we've got to be gentle with ourselves and take care of ourselves. I see this in a verse in parshat Mishpatim, as it says, "Little by little, I will drive them out from before thee, until thou be increased and thou shalt inherit the land (Shemot 23:30)." And similarly, from the Gemara Sukkah, where it says, tafasta meruba -- lo tafasta; tafasta muwat -- tafasta -- "Grasp a lot -- don't grasp; grasp a little -- grasp." If we try to take on too much all at once, it can be counterproductive and hurtful, but if we take it slowly, we can make healthy progress. Also, it says in Mishpatim, "And a stranger shalt thou not wrong, neither shalt thou oppress him, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt (22:20)." And Rashi says on the words, "And a stranger shalt thou not wrong," that here, "wrong" means "hurting with words;" by reminding a person of what they used to do. So, I take this as another reminder to be kind and gentle with each other and ourselves as we grow, and to not hurt each other and ourselves because of who we are or were, because we're growing slowly, slowly, but rather that we should treat each other with patience and love. Also, along these lines, I learned that it's not for us to spy-out life like the parsha of the Ten Spies asking, "Is it good, is it bad, do I want this?" But rather to know that life is a precious, sacred gift, overflowing with love and happiness, and to receive its challenges and grow through them with G-d's help, strength and blessing, like Yehoshua and Calev did, going into the land of Israel -- as Hashem told Yehoshua, "Be strong and of good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed -- for the Lord, thy G-d is with thee wherever thou goest (Yehoshua 1:9)."
"The entire world is a very narrow bridge, but the main thing is not to fear at all." -- Rebbe Nachman
"Always look on the bright side of life." -- Monty Python
"The sun will come out tomorrow… bet your bottom dollar that tommorow, there'll be sun…" -- Annie Musical Soundtrack
"Dance your fears away, worries for another day, let the music play (down on Fraggle Rock!)" -- Jim Henson
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