R. Nachman says exile is for lack of emunah (belief). He doesn't say that exile exists because lack of belief - but for it. Because who can be blamed for not believing - you can't trick yourself into believing; you can't pretend you believe if you don't. When G-d told Avraham that his children would inherit the land, and Avraham asked, "How do I know?" - at that moment, G-d told him that there would be exile. But this is not a punishment. There is no commandment to believe in G-d. If you do believe for a moment or two, there is a commandment to love and fear Him. But please don't pretend to believe if you don't. Because you could really believe if you let go of your fear-belief, your mask of belief that you wear because you think you're supposed to.
Imagine the coolest person you've ever met, or could ever imagine, or the coolest character in your favorite movie. Someone with the best sense of humor. Or remember that friend of yours who you were avoiding for so long because you wanted to tell him you were upset at him and then you finally told him and he admitted he'd been thinking about it the whole time and he's so sorry and he's so glad you said it and now you're better friends than ever. You have to know that G-d must be the Coolest, Funniest, and the most Compassionate, Understanding, Intelligent, Patient, Generous being. Why would you believe in a god who isn't, one who wants your fear-belief? He's waiting for you to believe in Him. Believing in someone, on a human level, means you believe that if you tell him the truth, he can handle it. Believing is an action - I believe you can keep a secret, so I tell you. I believe you won't hurt me, so I open up to you.
Exile - nothing is certain. This is a gift - so we might learn how to believe. A million opportunities to let go of control, to realize that the world is not entirely dependent on me for its propagation. Belief in G-d and belief in my friend and belief in myself are very related.
Belief means I don't have to do everything myself. I don't have to create you myself - I can let go and let you be you. Let G-d be G-d. And be surprised at how much more amazing the truth is.
Rav Gavriel Goldfeder
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Rav Gavriel Goldfeder is one of the first semicha recipients of the yeshiva. A graduate of Drew University in Religious Studies, he came to Bat Ayin after stints in other yeshivot and found a spiritual and intellectual home. Here he met his wife, Ketriellah, who was a student in our short-lived Women's Yeshiva. Upon graduation, Gavriel took the position of rabbi of the Aish Kodesh Congregation in Boulder, Colorado and together with Ketriellah and their growing family, they are busy creating (in Gavriel's words), "a community infused with Torah values, passion for learning and prayer, consideration of one another, and action, as well as deep celebration of the joys of life." |