I was never a morning person. Well, that's not exactly true, back before I had to get up for school, I remember getting up without any problems at all; I'd go into the bathroom with my Dad -- pretending to shave with him as he readied for his day. He's a morning person. What exactly does that mean? Well, for my Dad, it means that he's up at 5:30 and asleep by 10:00. For most of us, being awake and alert so early in the morning does not come naturally. This week's parsha records the death of the first "morning person."
For several weeks now, we've been learning Rebbe Nachman's Torah on aging, on lengthening your days. Each day, he says, starts out narrow, and widens and as the day goes on. This isn't merely a result of how we view the day, but rather it's a quality of the day itself, independent of what we do to try and expand it. But as the day goes on, it widens -- how quickly and how far is up to us. The initial narrowness is a way to ground ourselves before embarking on a new day. It allows us to get perspective, to wake up. Once we're awake and things are starting to expand, we'll hopefully be attuned enough to enjoy the treasure of that day. Like with a big jug, a narrow neck keeps you from sticking your hand in to grab what's inside…only the clever will discover how to extract the sweetness within.
Avraham was quite adept at this. Through "Yeerat Hashem," (understanding of the awesomeness of God) he was able to not only widen, but lengthen his days. Widen in the sense that he could find a way to relate to anyone, to teach anyone, to be a host to all the travelers that came his way. He could hear the message that was speaking to his heart at each specific moment. By connecting to the lesson being taught at each moment, says Rebbe Nachman, we too can free our hearts from the thick clouds surrounding it. Rashi mentions this idea of "arley lev," a heart so blocked and masked that we are prevented from understanding any of those messages that God is sending. It was Avraham's deep connection to God's will, and thus to his true purpose, that granted him such a long life. The same simple faith and love through which all little kids relate to the world stayed with them until his death. Thus at the end of his days, his years (as are his wife Sarah's) are enumerated separately: a hundred years and seventy years and five years. Even at 175, he was still five years old.
There's a Mishnah that teaches to double check if I've tithed (given the priests their allowance of the produce of my field), if I've put up an eruv (to allow for carrying on Shabbat), and if I've lit the Shabbat candles. Rav Daniel expanded this text: Only once we've separated out that which is not ours (through tithing), and then included our domain within that of others, can we bring in the light of Shabbat, of Shalom. Shabbat is called "last in deed, first in thought." Though it didn't come until the seventh day, its essence was informing each day's creation. We were born on the sixth day, on the eve of Shabbat, and it was God's "plan" to reveal the ultimate unification of God and his creations on that first Shabbat. But before Shabbat came, we made a choice that delayed this revelation.
Though we were first created alone, "It was not good that man was alone." Sure, we were intimately aware of Godliness in the world, but when nothing was hidden, there was nothing to choose. Once we came into relationship with our soul-mate, we made the choice to live in a world where God would be more concealed and our view of the world would be from our own limited perspective. Bummer, huh? Not at all. That's expansiveness. Painful as it may be, we can only grow wider when we have room to grow. By being forced to forge relationships and discover ways of relating to others, we express parts of ourself that would find no expression otherwise.
Deep. Delving into self to discover a connection to truth, a relationship with love. Wide. Expanding that perspective to take in the other. Deep. Absorbing that new understanding and attaching it to what we know, or thought we knew, of truth. Avraham rose early. Attuned to the gradual expansion of the day, he found the expansion of the self. Boker Tov (Good Morning).