Like a Shofar blast, Parashat Ki Seitzei shocks us into feeling with experiences ranging from degraded exploitation to poignant love. Recognizing the levels life brings us to, the parasha at once depicts the eternality of the new love between a passion-smitten Jewish man and the young maiden he chances upon in the fields, while at the same time instructing us to bring holiness even into the stench and trenches of war.
Parashat Ki Seitzei begins Elul, the month of teshuva. Although teshuva has a connotation of "repentance for sins," a closer definition is "return to a place of purity and holiness." Many cases involving family purity, and especially virginity, come up in Ki Seitzei, while the ancient Sefer Yetzira ("Book of Formation") corresponds Elul with the constellation of Virgo, the virgin. It is this state that we hope to return to by Rosh Hashana. "If your sins be red as scarlet, I will turn them white as wool." (Isaiah)
The teshuva of Elul, however, requires US to take the first step. Our parasha alludes to this with language of force, intent, and confrontation. "You shall root out the evil from your midst," several times, and the opening verse, "When you will go out (Ki seitzei) to war against your enemies…" During Elul, though, the enemy is nowhere but inside. For this, we need a different set of weapons.
"You shall have a place outside the camp and you shall go out there, outside. You shall have a shovel on your weaponry, and it will be that when you sit outside, you shall dig with it. You shall go back and cover your excrement."
At first blush, this could be from the army hygiene 101 handbook. I would like to suggest that the verse encodes an ancient technique for a comprehensive, deep level of teshuva. Real teshuva involves identifying and removing soul contaminants to return to a state of original purity. It requires more commitment than a string of knuckle taps on the chest. To paraphrase a popular song, we are "digging in the dirt, to find the places we got hurt."
"You shall have a place outside the camp…" You shall find a physical place where you can be alone. "…and you shall go out there, outside." And you shall use it to go outside your everyday consciousness.
"You shall have a shovel (yataid)…" Yataid primarily means wedge or stake. Thus, "You shall develop an ability to wedge open, through a point recalled from the experience of your day, more deeply into the history of your life experience..."
"…in addition to your weaponry (azain)…" Azain also means ear or handle. Thus, "…in addition to that with which you hear [you shall express]; in addition to that with which you handle [you shall allow to come about of its own]."
"…and it will be that when you sit outside, you shall dig (chafar) with it." Chafar also means excavate or unearth. Thus, "…and it will be that when you sit in this safe, secluded place, you shall excavate in order to discover, to unearth difficult experiences in your past."
"You shall go back and cover your excrement." You take in the world, and you give out your reaction. You must let it out to be healthy. But when that reaction would be unpleasant to those around you, you must allow it to lead you to "go back" (shavta, from teshuva) to the source of that reaction, that it may be neutralized and yield an insight.
Thus, we can render an interpretive translation. "You shall have a place to be alone and there you shall go outside your daily consciousness. You shall develop the facility, in order to enter your past, to penetrate and wedge open life memories, through a vulnerable point on the surface-a recent emotional experience-that you may enter deeply and temporarily dwell there, as staking down a tent there. And it will be that when you sit in this safe, secluded place, you shall go back to relive early traumatic experience so that any noxious aspects of your expression will be dissolved therein and lose their unpleasantness."
"He shall see the travail of his soul, he shall be sated with seeing." (Isaiah) "When you go (in) to war against your enemies," you will come to identify who your "enemies" are. Once you really see them, the "battlefield" suddenly becomes a friendly place.