So what gives the plants the power to venture out of their seed? Okay fine, granted - plants don't have any fear- but is that all that's holding us back? And fear of what? This question popped through my head thinking about Rosh Chodesh Adar, as Bat Ayin's tulips just raised their heads, giving forth their donation of what their heart beckoned to give. Beautiful, each one. And I think back to those freezing cold mornings when they were tucked into bed… I know my own challenge is getting out of bed in the cold, and these tulips sure just got straight to work.
The Seder (order) of mishnayot entitled Zeraim (seeds) is known in the tradition as the collection of Emuna, belief. Emuna is perhaps our greatest tool. According to Rebbe Nachman, it is the greatest key to leaving the current exile. A person's Emuna can be expressed in such amazing ways as optimism, determination, satisfaction, confidence, gratitude, inspiration, dedication- dynamic, light qualities we all want. A crisis of faith in what we're doing often means stagnation, self-doubt, bitterness, "sloginess", moroseness, maybe jealousy and just general darkness. This month, Adar, is all about the light of faith shining into the bleak end of winter. It's an incredible moment to feel the subtle changes of the earth as the early bloomers start appearing, maybe a chance warm day awakens in us all kinds of feelings of spring. Action, vigor, growth, levity, love and redemption are all springtime happenings.
Our first springtime holiday is Purim, which is all about the triumph over Amalek, our arch-enemy. Amalek is probably the only thing in the world worth hating. Amalek is the anti-spring. Amalek would gladly take away all the drive behind the flowers to bloom. Because in order for blooming to happen, a seed has to start a process of radical changes, from seed to root, to stem-branch, leaves and finally a flower - and maybe even a fruit.
But apples ain't nothing like apple seeds. That belief in self, in that which is stored deep inside me as potential, must be so strong in order to push me to start making the months of daily investment in growth. It's brought down that Mordecai visited Esther every day for 9 years when she was in the palace. Reb Shlomo said it very strongly: Amalek energy is not in your enemies that fight against you…It's in your friends that know you and tell you "you can't do it." Those are the voices that squash our visions, holding us in place. To tap into the ever-renewing flow of springtime, we must constantly remember the story of Moshe beating Amalek by acting from conviction.. "And his hands' were Emuna."
Purim is the holiday of Netzach, victorious energy that won't give up. It's the long haul that purifies our struggle, clarifies our vision and gives us a real connection to that which we're doing. That refinement of self and purpose is the first steps of our new direction - as individuals, as organizations, as a nation. A few weeks ago we read in the Torah that Hashem called us "Am Segula", a special people…Reb Shlomo says what makes a person seem special? People are special when they have something special in their own lives. A mother with a newborn, a couple in love, a passionate anyone… And the more I see the parts of my life as special, the more special I become. On Purim, the work is to reduce all the complications to something simple. To reconnect with that which I would make no compromises for. What is that pure? Which relationships are my bottom line? When we touch down to those inner fires- deepest yearnings- we become inspired actors. "Jews drunk with their yiddishkeit." "Chosen to show others how they are also chosen." A word of thanks to Reb Shlomo for those quotes and for showing us how pure and simple it can be at its root. May we be blessed with a few moments and connections to the ultimate clarities this month- And with the strength to live moments that hold integrity for our dreams.
Shaul David Judelman
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Shaul David Judelman currently resides in Jerusalem. After growing up amongst the Douglas Firs of Seattle, Washington, he came to Israel on a quest for Judaism alive in its land. He spent six years in the Bat Ayin Yeshiva Rabbinical program and now teaches at Yeshivat Simchat Shlomo while working on several different environmental initiatives in Jerusalem. He is the founder and coordinator of Simchat Shlomo’s Eco-Activist Beit Midrash, a program offering holistic in-depth Torah study around issues of ecology. |